Minimalistic At Best...

Being the adventures of a young man whose principal interests are creativity, ultra-violence and Mario

6.28.2004

"When all else fails..."

So, I've just been taking it easy lately. Hanging out with Jason and Mike. Amanda and Roxanne have been there too. Last night was weird...For the most part it was enjoyable, but I've just come to believe I bring the worst out in people. I mean, it seems whenever I'm around, Amanda, Roxanne, and Mike get into lousy moods and hate eachother...and me. I don't know what to make of it. But theres one thing I feel really bad about that happened last night. We (all mentioned above) went to Dunkin Donuts, and I was taking turns fast to tease the girls. Little did I know their coffee was open, and it spilled on them. By the time I realized what was going on, I'd made it to my house, and they were all pissed at me...and I was confused. Then they yelled about the coffee. Oops. So now this mood hung in the air, of semi-madness on my part. Like I was crazy and unstable, and I had the feeling that they thought I was driving fast because of Roxanne, and that just made me feel too ackward. In reality, I was driving like that to tease the girls, and have fun. But once again, I seemed like an asshole.

This happens way too often.

So now I don't even know what they think of me. But I can't go on caring too much. I've done the "abandon your feelings towards others and become a cold-hearted asshole" thing before, and it's easy. But I like Roxanne, I do. And I like Amanda too. And I want them to think about me in a good way, not a bad way. But it seems like every time I'm in the same room as them, every single thing I say offends them. And I just don't know what to do anymore. There's obvious hostility between me and Roxanne, and I hate it. But I don't want it to affect everyone. That isn't fair. But overall, life is the same. It dosen't suck...it's just hard. I'm struggling. But Nintendo is keeping me stable.

Thanks, Nintendo! ::Thumbs Up::

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